Welcome to A Prairie View. I am a 50 year old Christian wife, mom and grandma, living her life out on the great plains of Kansas. You will find me at our church in the mornings (I am the secretary), and by my husband's side in the afternoon (he dispatches 15 trucks for a trucking company).
I love to read, write, blog, do Bible studies, and search for the meaning of my life and why I am here. I am glad you stopped by. Please leave me a comment if you would and let me know you are were here.
David asked me what I wanted for my upcoming birthday. I actually cannot think of one material thing that I want. I have everything, and then some, that I want. I am turning 50 and that is scary for me, and yet, I also would like to tackle this new decade of my life with some goals and a new attitude. Maybe he could get me a health insurance quote for my birthday. For our anniversary, we went shopping and we spent a good chunk of change. We both contributed to it, it wasn’t just one person paying for everything. It was a tribute to the bumpy financial road we have traveled over the years. We are doing OK right now. The only black cloud that hangs over us is not having health insurance. Maybe as we slide into this new range of numbers of age, we can tackle that part of our lives as well, and get some health insurance. One way or the other. We have been extremely fortunate so far, but one day, our luck is going to run out. I would really like to have some kind of insurance in place. Its worth checking into — again — and doing more research. At this time of our lives, not having insurance is not a good thing.
A year ago, Ethan talked me into letting him get his own domain, and starting a blog. He came up with a really great name, Acting Thru Faith, and so I said “yes”. Its only $3 a month, and something like $15 a year to own this fine piece of internet real estate. Shortly after getting it though, he started working, and hasn’t had much time he could call his own, so very little has been done with the website/blog. I even had my wonderful and sweet banner maker, Becky, make a special banner for the site that turned out really awesome, but nope… still nothing. I told him if he didn’t start using the site, I was going to take it over. So, we put a “co-author” blurb in the sidebar, but I didn’t get over there much either.
But. I had a brainstorm this morning, and so I have been working on that today. I set up a new blog for him/us — and made the domain name become a splash page of sorts. I found a really cool picture that I thought Ethan would like, and in the tabs at the top, I have made the distinction “Ethan’s Posts” — and “Mom’s Posts”. Then I copied the few entries that he had on the original blog, and moved them to the new one, and marked them to be housed in an “Ethan” category. Whenever I add anything over there, it will go in a “Mom” category. So. When people go to the orginial website, they can either go to all of Ethan’s entries, or to all of mine. They are grouped seperately. That way, if someone just wants Ethan’s stuff, they don’t have to wade through all of my posts over there to find his. I have a specific vision for this blog. Of course there is the one that Ethan would write everyday or at least several times a week, and make it his own little niche in the world of blogging. But, for right now, thats not going to happen. So, plan B would to make it an “Ethan” blog — its still “all” Ethan, but with some input from me. I can blog about his day and such, or post pictures or video clips. Add newspaper clippings when he’s in the newspaper. Post things of interest pertinent to teens. Eventually, I would like to monetize it. But for right now, I would just like to see it be a fairly active blog, and with Ethan residing there alone, thats not going to happen.
Its been a laid back, easy going kind of day. David stood around at an auction in single digit tempatures, but that was HIS choice. I chose to stay in where it was nice and toasty warm. I had a bit of an upset stomach, so spent part of the day, just curled up in my recliner with a warm fuzzy blanket, and my own little space heater (our cat). Last night was equally laid back and easy going. Ethan had to work until 9:00, so I waited until he got home, and then we went out to David’s mom and dad’s house, where David was, as well as his sister and her family.
What did we do? They have been going through some old home movies. These movies go all the way back to the 30’s. It was interesting seeing David’s dad when he was little. David’s sister is checking into a couple of places to see what can be done, if anything, to preserve these films, and see if they can be put on to a CD, or something similiar. Some probably aren’t worth preserving, but there were a few that most definately are. So, hopefully, this is something that can be done.
Last night was the HIgh School Winter Music Program. It was orginially scheduled for last Monday, but bad weather rescheduled it to last night. I have attended every single Music Program Ethan has been in. It has been amazing, watching these kids take raw talent and evolve it into an enjoyable evening. We would “grin and bear it” when they were in grade school and middle school But, the last few years of High School performers, you can hear their voices maturing.
As I watched them sing, you couldn’t help but notice this big tall kid on the back row. ________________0________________. You have this row of singers, and the head level is pretty much level, all the way across. Except for Ethan. He stood a good head above everyone else. At 6′, that tends to happen. Seeing that, brought back a memory of when I was in high school, and in the choir, much like this one. I was a good kid, never got in trouble. I would go as far to say that I was probably one of those kids that pretty much went unnoticed. But this one particular day, it was the day of practice before the evening performance. And WHY she had never noticed this before, is beyond me, but the choir director got after me. She singled me out, and told me to stop playing around, and to get off the book, or I could go to the office. I was mortified. Maybe I wore shoes with a slightly higher heel that day. I don’t remember. But, she thought I was trying to be funny by standing on a book to make myself taller than everyone else. Ah. No. I WAS taller than most everyone else at that age. I remember a few kids coming to my defense, that I WASN’T clowning around. She came around to the back of riser to look, and then apologized. I think she was just stressing out because of the upcoming performance, and looking at that group of kids last night, and seeing my kid not being in the flow of unity that one would expect, I could see it through her eyes last night. But, as a shy high school girl some 30 years ago, who never ever got yelled at by a teacher, I didn’t like it one. bit.
This Afternoon
Cloudy With A 20 Percent Chance Of Light Freezing Drizzle And Sleet. Highs Around 25. North Winds 5 To 10 Mph.
Even though my family is out and about, I’m not venturing out. It was “traumatic” enough for me just attending church. David did call and told me to go in the circle drive the wrong way, which would put the driver’s side towards the building, and he’d be watching for me. Once I got there, he came out, I got out of my Explorer, and made my way the few short feet to the inside of the building. It had been scraped and salted, but it was still sleeting, and, it was still a bit icy. Granted, I think part of it was just my own fear, being afraid to fall (I’ve been there and done that, and me falling would not be a good deal). My heart was pounding, and I just felt real fear, as I made my way to the building. And of course, we have the same scenerio once church was over. That was enough getting out for me.
With the weather the way it, David may have to rework all the loads he had scheduled for his drivers. One or two of them have said they would just as soon not drive in weather conditions like this, so he needs to refigure everything. So, he went out to the office.
And Ethan, sadly, is at a funeral. He had to work today, but they have been really flexible with the kids the weekend, and their schedules. I’ve really gone back and forth about whether or not I should be there. I didn’t know Andrew, but I did know his mom. More in passing, even though she is like, a third generation cousin to David. So, I left it up to Ethan to what I should do. I felt like I should be there for him, if for no other reason, but he said he would probably be sitting with his friends. The funeral is being held at the school. Visitation was from 4:00 - 6:00 last night. But, it was at least after 8:00 before the family was able to leave. Ethan called at 7:15 (he went up there at 5:00), and said he just left the funeral home. Literally hundreds of people there. Selfishly, I am glad Ethan said he didn’t need me there. A funeral is hard enough to deal with under the “best” of circumstances (and there are never any good circumstances). But a funeral for a child just a year older than your own, with hundreds of youth at this funeral … I’m at a place emotionally right now … its not something I really wanted to go through. My mom died December 14 (2003) … thats just a few day from now, and, that has me at “a place” emotionally, that is making me having to deal with my emotions and feelings. However, if Ethan had told me he really wanted me there — I would have put my own emotions and feelings aside and I would have been there for him. Ethan has should be a side of maturity this week through this whole ordeal; and so I trust him when he tells me that it was ok for me not to be there.
The JIMS Quartet- which stands for Jesus Is My Savior, was Special Music at church yesterday. Harry, Ethan and Dub all go to Topeka every Tuesday to practice, and ultimately perform with a larger group of Barbershoppers (I think there is probably 30 in all). Harry wanted to have a Barbershop quartet down here, but couldn’t find any other men to be a part of it. So, they adopted Linda, who sings alto, and together, they produce (usually), a well rounded, nice sounding Barbershop Quartet.
The deep bass you hear … thats my “baby boy”. When did he stop being a baby boy, and develop that low grown man voice? I have a whole collection of these guys singing. If you see the “video clip” link on my blogs… thats what most of them are. I have finally gotten over my nervousness when he or they sing. Ethan is singing a solo the Sunday before Christmas. Now THEN I will probably be nervous. But, he’ll do well. He always does.
With a forecast like: Cloudy With A 20 Percent Chance Of Snow In The Morning…Then Partly Sunny In The Afternoon. Highs Around 40. Southwest Winds 5 To 10 Mph., I think we can safely say that we can pack the camping gear away for a few months. We enjoyed camping this fall, and looking forward to going this spring and summer. But, once it hits 50 or 60 degrees, and lower, we tend to say, “OK, it was fun while it lasted”. Maybe the heater does work in the camper, but I would just as soon not find out. The air conditioner works great, and so I anticipate alot of weekends out to the lake come spring. But, it can’t have snow in the forecast.
Just one more day, and then we have a long 4 day holiday weekend ahead of us. I can hardly wait. I have a plan in mind, and I would really like to see it fall into place and happen. It goes something like this:
Thursday: We won’t have to be to Matt’s until noon or a little after. So, I’m going to put my guys to work. Ethan can keep the washing machine going, and he can bring those clothes as well as what is on the stack back there, — bring it into David, and David can fold. Between the two of them, its not a hard job, just time consuming, but if they could get it done, it would be a huge burden off of me. While they are doing that, I would be working on the kitchen. Clean the counter top off, go through some cabinets — just get it half way organized …something I’ve wanted to do for awhile. That would take care of Thursday.
Friday: David will go to work as usual. I’m want to break these 3 days down like this: Work, Work, Play. Friday, assuming we go laundry done, and I go the kitchen done, I then want to tackle the dining room. We got part of it done a few weeks ago, and I would like to finish up this weekend. It would also be nice if Ethan would tackle his room. But, if we get the living room done, I’ll be happy.
Saturday: Assuming I got the housework done like I wanted to Thursday and Friday, Saturday I want to do paperwork. Get the IFTA report paperwork done. Literally work on it all done. If I get it done, again, a huge burden off my shoulders.
Sunday: ASSUMING…I got all the above things done, then I would just like to play Sunday. We’ll attend church Sunday, but the rest of the day would be mine. Rent a couple movies, work on blogs, maybe get some entries done ahead, so they are ready to go when its time (like some of the memes and such). And, of course, if there are any blogging assignments to do, work on them. But, just enjoy the day, no pressure, and feel good that I got some things accomplished over the weekend. (instead of playing, with a “I’ll get to it” attitude like I sometimes do).
Now. If the other two will just cooperate and go along with my plan, we should be set. It would be nice if they would pitch in and help! We could do some amazing things if we worked as a team.
Each person’s life is a story that is telling itself in the living.
~ A Quote by William Throsby Bridges
A few years ago, I would have thought something like My Footprints.com was a good idea, but something we would do “someday”, and put it on the back burner, and probably would have never given it another thought. But. In the last 4 years, I have had to plan 2 funerals. My mom died unexpectedly, December 2003. The number of funerals I have been to are few, and the number of funerals I have planned, up to that point, were non-existant. I just had no clue. Fortunately, my mom and I were really really close, and the funeral home walked me through the process. Also, my aunt was a part of our lives at that time, so anything about the family or the past that I didn’t know, she had all the answers.
However. When my aunt passed away, who then did I turn to for answers? In all reality, I turned to my aunt. Her death was expected, and she was the type of person who planned for things far in advance. 6 months prior to her death, she and I were sitting in the funeral home, going over the questionaire that they normally used after the person had passed away, and the family gave the answers. I am so glad that we did it when we did, because there was so many things I didn’t know about her, or if I did know about it, I couldn’t fill in the right dates. For instance, I knew she was in the Army. But I couldn’t tell you the years, or what rank she was. She was in the Army when I was a little kid. I didn’t know she had been a church secretary (which I found fascinating, because that I what I am presently). She filled in alot of important information, and I kept that paper in a safe place, and I was thankful that that was one less detail that I had to deal with when she passed away.
My Footprints.com does exact what she and I did in the funeral home, only they taken it a few steps further, and it is online. Its Free to Join. MyFootprints.com is truly a unique website that allows a person make the process of planning a funeral just a bit easier for those they leave behind. Until you are actually in the middle of all the details of a funeral, whether the death is expected or not, you just do. not. realize how many questions there are, how many things need to be taken care of. You think you know the person. But once they are gone, you realize that there are so many questions you didn’t realize you had, until then.
I have signed up, (its free!) and I am going to begin the process of building my “Footprint“. Just a few weeks after my mom died, we discovered that my heart was and still is, in Atrial Fib. It beats out of rhythm a good portion of the time. And I have to be honest. I don’t think I’ll live to be the ripe old age of 90, not even close. And so, if my days are numbered, whether it be next year, or years down the road, I would really like to leave behind a legacy, in my own wording. To create a legacy of who I am — not of who David or Ethan or the rest of my children think I am. My family has alot of information of our family tree, so I would like to build on that, and make that information a part of my “Footprint“. With this service, you can leave final wishes and even emails for people, that will be sent after your death. You can keep a life journal and a secret diary. You can create a timeline of your life.
Since I blog alot, I understand that there is alot “about me” already out there for anyone and everyone to read. Maybe too much information, in the aspect that I have kept a blog for 6 or 7 years now, and that is alot of reading to go through, when you blog most every day. But, being able to go to a website like “My Footprint“, your legacy is all layed out right there. Extensive enough for people to get a feel for who you are, and yet not so much information that it is overwhelming. It even gives obituary information and funeral information.
The process is this. You sign up (and again, I say — its Free!). You create an account. From there, you just start filling in your information. Adding pictures. I know this sounds a bit odd, but in today technology, it makes a lot of sense. Create emails, of things you would like to say to loved ones after you die. Or, if you want your sister to have that special jewelry box, or your youngest daughter to have a certain picture that has hung on your wall for years … those final wishes can be documented within this site. You need to ask someone to be your Trusted Keyholder (that would be maybe someone at your church, an attorney, a family member or a close friend). That person will need to be a member of My Footprints. When you die, that person will be emailed a special code for activation of your Footprint. They will be responsible in accessing your Last Wishes. And they enter any Visitation and Funeral information.
Having been through this process so recently, I love having a tool like this at my fingertips that I can create myself, and hopefully,make the process of planning my funeral just a bit easier. Something else I noticed that I could do — since I do keep a daily blog already, I noticed that they had banners that can be added to my website or blog. With a little bit of code, I can add my Footprint to my blog. I can see my family following along, and perhaps helping me add information and pictures to it. I am going to be sending out invitations to my “Footprint” to friends and family as soon as I get some information added to it.
If you are interested in more information about this truly unique and and dynamic service, I encourage you to play the video below. And I also encourage you to create your own legacy and leave your own Footprint.
I’m proud of Ethan. After all the complaining he did about Kevin scheduling him for yesterday, he not only stepped up to the plate by being up at the school before 7:00 yesterday morning — working all morning (he only needed to work 2 hours… and there were alot of the kids in his class that didn’t work at all. I thought this was Junior Class fundraiser. But, I guess its that way with all organizations. 10% of the people doing 90% of the work….) Anyway, he stopped at 1:00, came home, and then went to work …at his “real” job at 2:00. He worked from 2:00-9:00.
But. What makes me proud of him is that he told us he was probably working today, even though his schedule show he’s off. He said the way they left it was to “be on call”. That there would be a chance they might be calling him if they go swamp. Guess what. They called him. We attended church. Stopped at the grocery store. Everything look under control. We just walked in the house, and Nicky called and said “Ethan, I lied. We need you. Finish your lunch, but could you please come before 1:00?”. He finished his lunch (I’m glad we decided to deli. The groceries weren’t even in the house yet, let alone anything fixed) — and then headed up to work. No complaining. No “this isn’t fair”. Course, I think at this point, he looking at the paycheck that waits for him at the finish line of the week. His normal 2-weeks accumulation of 45 hours or so just went to 56 hours. And if he keeps his charging of stuff to a minimum, he will have a super good paycheck this next time around.
He can be such a pain some times, but he truly is a good kid!
It doesn’t annoy me, but then, I like to read anyway, so this is just an extention of that. But, David is always getting after Ethan for having the closed captioning feature on. Well, he used to. Ethan has finally stopped doing it. I’m not sure what Ethan’s reasoning was — part of it was, he would want to talk during the commercials, so he’d mute the TV. But other times, he just had it on because, for whatever reason, he likes having that feature on. There are times when David is on the phone to one of his drivers, and we have to have the volumn turned down, I like being able to read what is being said. I know the closed captioning is a tool for more than just our entertainment. Its a great thing to have if you are not able to hear, as well as other reasons. But, in our household, it was a source of annoyment for some.
A couple of weeks ago, the premiere of Las Vegas was on, but David couldn’t be home to watch it, and it is his very favorite show. So, Ethan recorded it for him, and all was good.
The Unit is David’s 2nd favorite show, and it was on tonight, and again, he wasn’t able to be home to watch it. “Record it”, he said. I told Ethan to set it up for me, so all I had to do was push the record button, and we’d be good to go. Ethan was working on his homework — matter of fact, there was some question to whether or not he would even go to Barbershop Practice (when he goes to practice, he leaves at 6:00, and isn’t home until 11:00 or a bit later. Its an hour’s drive to practice, so obviously, an hour home. And then a 2 hour practice). He worked on it right up to the moment Harry pulled in the driveway. He was probably gone an hour before I realized — He didn’t set the VCR for me to record The Unit for dad.
*Sigh. Ok. How hard can it be? I was pretty sure I knew what to do, but not 100% sure. I called David and he confirmed what I though I needed to do. I played around with it a little bit to make sure I knew what I was doing, and then his show came on, and I recorded it. Which I’m glad I did. Its a good show. But tonight’s episode was REALLY good, and I know David will enjoy watching it. So, I’m glad I figured it out for him.
But. He owes me. I had to step outside of my box and put my thinking cap on and try and figure out how to do something I hadn’t ever done before. But, like he says, “its not rocket science”, and I was able to figure it out without using too many brain cells.
Life has a funny way of going on, regardless of what happens within our lives. David and I were both divorced before we met each other. Our 1st marriages both lasted less than 5 years. So, stepping into, what I felt like, was someone else’s shoes, was something that bothered me, but I didn’t really think of it from the perspective of the family. David’s brother is getting married this weekend. He divorced last year. They married the year before David and I did, so if they had remained married, they would be celebrating 25 years next year. Instead, he is starting over. There won’t be a big wedding, no brides maids or groomsmen. Roger won’t have to worry about buying a groomsmen gift for his best man. It will be a very private, very simple wedding. We have know the lady he is marrying for a long time, and she is a good woman. But, it still seems strange. Not having what has been the other half of Roger for so long as a part of the family. But that’s life. And as we all know — life goes on.
Being a typical 16 year old boy, Ethan would love to add car spoilers — to A car. Not necessarily HIS car. His car is older than he is, and right now, he’s pretty content just being able to keep up with the insurance and gas on it. But as he dreams, of that shiny red Corvette (yeah right….dream on, Ethan…), he lists off a half dozen accessories he would love to add it. And who knows what direction his life will take? He loves to sing, and sings well, so who knows. He could be at the right place at the right time, and the next thing we know, we are buying tickets to hear him sing (a mom can dream, too, can’t she?). Course, with his track record, he probably should be one of these celebrities that has someone drive him all over. Unfortunately, he’s too much like Britney these days with his driving record. Nothing major, just little fender benders. But, at $5.85 an hour, it will take him awhile to get all the damage paid for.
I suppose in the big scope of things, there are worse things to have a reputation for when you are a 16 year old boy. But Ethan is going to get a reputation for pie baking. He made 2 pies for his youth group fund raiser this weekend; and then in his newspaper class, it is someone’s birthday tomorrow, and he is baking her a pie. Apple to be exact. How sweet is that? He’ll never be a jock, but he may give Betty Crocker a run for her money.
My brother-in-law’s favorite car is the Mustang. He had one when he was in High School, and now that he is in his 40’s, he is wanting to find a red ‘67 Mustang and restore it back into original condition. He has been on the lookout for one, but hasn’t found that specific year, or if he did, it was way out of his price range. I would imagine anything he would find, would take quite a bit of work, but that would be part of the whole venture of getting and owning one. Ethan has a 91 Cavaliar — the car is the same age he is! He hasn’t had to do much to it except replace the exhaust. He is just grateful he has a car, but if money were no object, I know he wishes he had been replacing a Mustang exhaust. He would love to own a Mustang as well. Very popular car!
I have come a long ways. This is one of those mornings, when I would have been so keyed up, and nothing would have gone right. Ethan is in a Barbershop quartet, and they have Special Music this morning. I used to get sooo nervous, almost panic-y when he had to perform. I still get a bit nervous. The heart races. I pray they do well. Or more specifically, that he does well. I don’t make a good stage mom. But I am getting better. Need to grab my camera and will add the video clip to my collection of other clips I have gotten of him. I think I have taken more video clips of him than I have regular pictures. I’m glad I have that option though. The things he does, are “in motion” things, and loose something in the translation when they are just still pictures. Isn’t technology wonderful?
Awhile back, I found a photo album plugin that is really easy to use, and I decided that at Serenity (my “ad-free” blog), I would post chronological albums, but here, I would do the albums by subject. Its going to take me a little bit to get the photo album filled just like I want it, but in the mean time, I will give a head-ups here, for those interested, when I do update the album.
I needed to do a review on a personalized pacifier that I had recieved, so we got together with David’s daughter — Sarah and Becky, and ate supper together, and I got my photo opp fix. Since the whole purpose of this visit this time around was to photograph Alex with his new pacifier, I took lots and lots of pictures. I also got some general ones which I’ll try to get added this weekend. The photo album of Alex is here and the review I did for the pacifier is here.
When Jason and April said “I do” Friday night, these 2 little boys became brothers. I hope that they can form a bond over the years, and become two young adults that know they have each other’s backs, that they can find a bond of brotherhood. I know howstressful, how hard it can be blending 2 families — we have been there and done that. I wish our kids were closer, but there seems to this invisible dividing line. Its OK. But its not what I would have wished for my kids. I wish these 2 little boys the best in the years to come.
Sinced we didn’t camp, we went to where the campers were. David’s 2 brothers and their families camped up near Topeka, so we went up there this afternoon for lunch/supper and just some general family time. Ethan had to work, so he didn’t go. While we were there, David’s mom and dad came with their motorhome. They had a booth at an show somewhere, and were on their way home. So, they come tooling in with their motorhome and cargo trailer. Kinda wished we had taken ours up there this weekend; and yet, it would have just been me up there with everyone. So, what we did is fine. We’ll have a chance sometime this summer to go camping. I was able to snap a few pictures. I’ll add the rest to the Photo Blog.
Oh. And by the way, thats not a puppy she’s holding. Its a baby goat. David’s niece just bought a few goats (they are like 2 weeks old), and they still need to bottle feed them; so they had them out to the campsite as well.
Ethan got his schedule today. He starts training at the grocery store on Monday. He works Monday, Wednesday, Thursday and Saturday. He still have school next week, so his hours are from 3:30 - 8:00. Then on Saturday, he works from 11:00 until 8:00. Not bad for his first week. He is sooo wanting to audition for a play that is coming up. I understand, but I just don’t think its a good idea. I think he needs to get his feet wet and see what its like working in the real world. I would like to see him stay involved in Barbershop — and that is just one night a week. But, with a play production, its hard to say when practices are; plus, I know he is going to come home dog tired, and then to have to work and rehearse on lines… I just think with everything, it is going to be too much. He just needs to focus on his new job and the work schedule.
As Gordon (our minister) was pulling together information for his funeral message for Aunt Jo, I realized just how limited my memories of her were. It would be unfair to base a summary of her life on these past few years. She was so much more than that. So, I called upon family to email me with their thoughts and memories of her. Along with mine, these are those memories.
Mine
Unlike most of the family, I really don’t have a lot of “old” memories of Aunt Jo. But I do have many many new memories of her. Growing up, she was a picture on the wall. The aunt in the army suit. The aunt who sent home Japanese pajamas to all of us. She had many memories of me growing up, and I enjoyed hearing about them, sometimes shshing her, when it was embarrassing, and I didn’t want Ethan to tease me about it. But, she shared with me lots of things I had forgotten, and a lot of things that I don’t remember.
I believe with all my heart that Aunt Jo was brought into my life for a purpose. When Mom died as suddenly as she did, I was devasted. It never occurred to me that I would lose my mother in just the blink of an eye. Left to my own devices, I probably would have shut off the world, because my mother was such a intricate part of my life.
But God had other plans for me. He knew my way of dealing with things, and He wasn’t going to let that happen. Mom and Aunt Jo were two peas in a pod. They took care of each other, they enjoyed those few months they had together to the fullest, even though it seemed like if one wasn’t in the hospital, the other was. They were sisters, through and through, and stood by each other, despite the many health problems.
The moment my mother died, my Aunt Jo stepped in. Yes, in many ways, I was her caregiver. But. If you really examine the situation, she was my caregiver. She kept me going. She pushed. She prodded. She made me do things that I didn’t really want to do. But, in the end, she gave me a reason to keep giving life all I could give it.
Yes, there were times we got on each others nerves, and I know there were plenty of times I didn’t do things just like she would have had them done, but there were many good times as well. She knew she could call on me when her body let her down. We laughed. We’ve cried. She shared with me many memories of the past. She seemed to be the center of this family – keeping everyone posted of how everyone was doing. She loved to talk on the phone, and she loved her computer. Keeping in touch with everyone was important to her.
I cherish all the memories I have of her these past few years. She was a very loving and giving person. Strong and independent. Getting to know her these past few years, despite the health problems, has been a gift to me. She taught me the meaning of “never give up”. And she will be deeply missed.
Aunt Ida Mae (her sister)
I do have some fond memories of when I came up to visit her
We were doing some of her “circle puzzle books, and she went
and got one from the bedroom and told me to take it home!
So now I am addicted to them.
Also, after she was in Life Care Center, I spent most of
one week, staying in her apartment at night, & visiting her
in the daytime,, and we would go down and play dominoes
with her friends, watching the birds, and working on the
jigsaw
puzzles—eating noon meals there. I got to set in
on some of her therapy sessions, and if they didn’t have
her busy elsewhere, we talked. They certainly kept her
busy!
I know she loved to travel. And she did quite a bit of that
“in the service”. She sent back Japanese kimonoes for our
children from Japan (which we still have)
She loved to tell jokes, & laughing a lot when she felt
good!
She loved Mexican food, and grabbed every chance to get
out and go there—-also her cookies and brownies.
I remember she loved to talk on the phone, and we talked
quite frequently, which I will cherish those chats a lot.
I remember when Betty Jo, Faye and Carolyn & Pete and other
family members got together and made a wonderful “Memory”
book for our 50th ANNIVERSARY, WHICH i WILL CHERISH
always! And that she and Faye and all the siblings came
to our celebration.
One time when my daughter, Becky and I were down to see her
and we had gone to eat Mexican
food, then to DQ for a “Dilly Bar”, and then we took her
out riding, she was telling us the story of when they were
stealing watermelons with some friends (we’ve all done that
in our younger years) and the man that owned the patch came
out with a shotgun & probably shot in the air and they thought
they were goners. In the meantime, while they were running
try-
ing to get away, she lost her shoes in the mud, and she
got in trouble for losing her shoes when she got home.
She loved music, and had quite a collection.
I know that she loved & appreciated Carolyn, Ethan, & Dave
for all their help, and being her caretaker in her final days
and from her family we say THANK YOU !!
I think she was a (ornery) giving and caring
sister,aunt,friend,
and that she was courageous person in her illness!
Aunt June(her sister)
Betty Jo was a special sister to me as she was 15 months older than me. We played together good most of the time, but there was times that she got mad at me, because I was the baby and I got my way most of the time. We sat out in the porch swing and played with our dolls or paper dolls, dressing them and changing their cloths . We went to our cousin Gladys’s place a lot of times. We played in the bar ditch close to our house when it rained. It was like a swimming pool to us, dirty, but we loved it. I am so thankful that she got to come to our school reunion. She came the furthest as she had to come all the was from Florida. We had such a good visit with her and Babe. When she moved to Burlington to be near Thelma Faye, she really enjoyed that, After Faye passed away she was so thankful that she had Carolyn and Ethan to keep her company. I will never forget the good times that we had while she was here.
Uncle Pete (her brother)
I was in the fourth grade and had not heard of the birds and bees at age ten. We suddenly moved into Holcomb from our home eleven miles out in the country. We also had a hired girl. None of this raised a flag for me.
I remember walking home from school on March the second in 1936. To my great surprise, Mom was in bed and I had a baby sister! I was used to puppies and they told me I blurted out “She even has her eyes open”.
Donna (a niece)
A few months ago I took a lady friend of mine with me to see Aunt Jo at the Care Center. When I walked in the door the first thing out of her mouth was “where is Paul”? It wasn’t hello Donna or Hi, nice to see you…it was all about Paul. I guess she figured that he was part of the family after 30 years but I was a bit taken back. Needless to say I told Paul the story and he and I were able to go visit her a few weeks later. She was delighted to see him. He pushed her up and down the hall in her wheelchair and her hair was flying in the breeze. She did tell him he needed driving lessons after he ran her chair into a curio cabinet but we sure had fun. We had lunch with her, watched the birds and took some pictures. It was a memorable day for us all. We certainly will miss her.
Gladys Marie & Dave (a cousin)
Betty Jo,leaves a lot of memories, especially for “Gladys Marie” when they were kids. It was always “Mama, Can I go over to “Jo and Junes” or ” Aunt Florence can Jo and June come and spend the night with me? ” We lived in Holcomb and cherish the times. We
would Skate, with those with steel wheels and straps, as they had sidewalks!
Jo and June would come to our house, and we’d play in the Sugar Cane, try jumping Oldweiler’s ditches full of water, and climb up the Silo, all which were forbidden
to do. Got grounded for it too! We loved to go down to the River and look around.
They’d have to dodge the “Bees” on the road, when they came to our house.
At her house we’d steal cherries off their cherry tree! Get into Uncle Ed’s candy.
She helped a lot with the huge gardens they had between them and Mrs.
Barkosky. She helped dress this lady with rheumatism many years.
We went next door to the Dearth’s and climbed in their dirty old barn!
Opps… that is where Gladys got a 10 inch scar on her leg. Crime did pay!
Mae, Faye, Eldon, Jo and June would come to our house and we’d play “Work-up” baseball. Even Gladys’s mom played. They loved our Cats. Worked Puzzles too!
Many, were the Easter eggs hunts we had. Betty Jo was a hard worker, she hardly ever complained. At school she could send that volley ball over the net with ease. She was the manager of the girls Basket ball team, she played in the Band. It was fun going to the band trip to Emporia, she always shared money ,songs, and our silly jokes with us.
Betty Jo came to our church, the Fellowship Baptist, in Garden City and
was saved. It was on January 17,1957 she followed the Lord in Baptism.
She worked for our Pastor, W.T. Froggatte as church secretary.
In March 1957 she was one of the Bridesmaid’s in our Wedding.
Soon after she joined the Service. Later she moved to Florida.
In 1999 she came all the way back to the Holcomb Reunion.
We enjoyed the fellowship with the whole family.
June and Ida Mae live here in town and we get to visit quite a bit.
Pete and Le Juan have been so good to keep us informed with family history. We love getting email from Bud and Kathy, as well as the others. Eldon’s wife, Lois and I reminised the other day about Betty Jo. So glad she knew Jesus as her Lord and Saviour.
We stopped by to see Betty Jo in May of this year, and she was
dressed for the 50″s, eating a “Hot Dog” listening to the music as
the program that day was planned.. In her room she showed
us her Musical Dolls, Pictures, and we reminisced about the good ole days.
We will never forget her, she was one special “cousin” and “Friend.”
l Peter 5:7 “Casting all your care upon Him, for He careth for YOU”
When the sun begins to set, so many things I haven’t done yet -
Oh but I won’t worry cause there’s no hurry, the world’s not passing me by -
The Lord, He knows just where each day goes
I know He won’t leave me behind
And I won’t be bringing a single thing that my heart can’t carry inside
No I’m going home and I’m only taking my time.
I don’t like doing it this way — being almost a week behind; but the whole intention of keeping a blog — within the big picture of things — is to keep an almost daily running of “what’s happenin’”. And the things I did the bullet list on a few days ago are things, if I had had the time, I would have done as an entry that day. But since I didnt, I’m going to take the time now, and do one long entry, with subheadings & dates, and get it done, and get back up to the current day. This has been my week, in a nutshell….
Aunt Jo
Saturday was not a good day. We were in and out, but not for very long; and both time we were out, the nursing home called. They keep me posted everytime a change is made, or a doctor’s order has been given. Her blood sugar level was pretty high, and they were just keeping me informed of what the Dr. was doing. The meter only goes up to 500, and it was above that. She was pretty much out of it, and that is unusual for her. Its when its low that she gets flakey on us. (her words:)
When I called back with the 2nd called, Saturday evening, they just wanted me to know that the doctor had ordered no more insulin. Even though it wasn’t coming down, he didn’t want to keep giving her insulin. The nurse pretty much implied that with her renal failure, she could slip into a coma with her sugar this high. I called my uncle to let him know; and we both agree to not take any action (i.e. call other family, or make a trip here) until morning and see how she was doing then.
Its been another hectic day. It was quiet at work; but afterwards, we were pretty much on the run. I needed to stop and pick up some information from my aunt about this meeting we are having tomorrow with Hospice. From there we went to the grocery store.
And we did good. Instead of throwing pop and chips in our cart … Ethan got yogurt and cucumbers. I’m proud of him for wanting to do this. Malachi is under “court order” not to drink any caffeine. So, we are trying to cut our intake of it as well, so when we go out, or even when he comes over here, it just won’t be around anymore. Not to mention it will be good for US not to drink it!
Once we got home, got groceries put away, and had just set down, the phone rings. Its my aunt & cousin from Garden City. They were in town, had picked up my Aunt Jo from the nursing home, and were sitting down to eat supper at the Mexican food restraunt, and wanted to know if we wanted to join them. My other aunt and cousin were here yesterday, and we did the same thing. IIt was good to see everyone again, and we managed to work around Ethan’s agenda. Last night, he had a Flag Retirement Ceremony with the Scouts. And tonight, he had Barbershop practice in Topeka. He was supposed to have left at 5:20 … but the guy he rides with called and said they weren’t have a board meeting tonight, so it would be 6:20 when he picked him up. So, it all fell neatly into place, Ethan got to eat supper, see everyone, and then go on with his evening.
