A Prairie View

Goldwing Owners

David went with his brother today and a bunch of his friends for a “motorcycle lunch”. They all rode their motorycles and met half way at this truck stop that we all like and has really good food. David and one of his brother have Honda’s, but his other brother has Goldwing. A. Nice. Goldwing. If it was a car, he would have numerous car covers, its that nice. He does cover it at night, but it is for more than just show. He has to travel alot to and from work, and this is one way he doesn’t spend a fortune in gas money (although, I would tend to think he paid a fortune for the bike . . .). David’s nephew has a Goldwing as well, and they are working on David and his brother to “upgrade” their bikes. I don’t see David OR his brother either one being Goldwing owners. David is too cheap (sorry, but he is. He won’t pay that kind of money that he won’t use that often). And David’s younger brother … he is more of a dirt bike kind of guy, so his loud Honda fits him, and I just can’t see him with a Goldwing. Just my opinion.

Getting Old Before My Time

 
I think I messed up last night. Maybe I should start having David dole out my medicines at night. I take one Metoprol and 2 Coumadine. In the mornings, I take a Furosemide, which is a duretic. I look at the labels, and I am positive I took the right medications last night. But the events since then are telling me otherwise. Not even holing up in a hotel in las vegas would make me feel better today. It started shortly after I went to bed last night. I had to get up to go to the bathroom. Ok. No big deal. I’m almost 50. It happens. But then, it happened again. And again. And again. I had taken a Forosemide at noon yesterday, and it had kicked in shortly after taking it. So, it kicking again during the middle of the night doesn’t sound right. And then today, my head has been fuzzy, and my heart has been irratic. All things that happen when I skip a dose of my Metoprol. I thought I was being really careful - esp in light of what the Furosemide does. The last thing I want to do is have to get up a dozen times during the night to go to the bathroom. But that is exactly what happen. So, I suppose that is what happened, which bothers me. I will have to be extra extra careful to not mix the two up. I am getting old before my time!
 

Senior Pictures

We learned last week that Ethan’s name is getting close to be at the top of the list. The person we wanted to use to take Ethan’s senior pictures has had quite a few people call him. When I last talked to him, he said “we’ll add him to this list”. So, was thrilled to hear it won’t be much longer. He is really reasonable with his prices and the pictures are good. The other company we were considering (because they gave out a “$100 off” senior picture packages at prom last spring) we would have to take out a cash advance loan to get their pictures. Their cheapest package was like $400, and that was WITH the $100 off card. I know this is a special time in Ethan’s life, but we don’t need to spend $500 on pictures.

Nothing To Hide

Matt (my middle son) is not the only one who has come a long ways. He comes by his stupid mistakes honestly. It took me a bit longer than it did him, but I do feel like I turn a corner in my life, and I am able to be “just like everyone else”, in some respects. It wasn’t always that way. I would purchase something that wasn’t budgeted, and then I’d be afraid to tell David. I would try to “fix” it with the next round of paychecks — by just not paying a bill. Which I would “fix” the next round of paychecks. See how this might snowball out of control? Well. It did. I would get desperate. I didn’t know about fast cash payday loans during those days, or I would have tried getting getting them to fix what I shouldn’t have done in the first place. Or, maybe not so much not doing — but rather just telling David right away. Yes, he probably would have been mad or upset. But not nearly as mad or upset as he was when things had snowballed out of control and I finally got the courage to tell him….several thousands of dollars of debt later. No to mention late bills, ruined credit. All the while, he thought everything was just fine.

I look back and question my actions. We finally found some middle ground — our own accounts. And slowly, giving me responsibility for one little bill. And then another. It made me feel like I was contributing to the financial part of our marriage, and yet, he wasn’t turning total control over to me. In the past year, I have payed off my Explorer, have our house payments paid ahead (like — through November!) — and if I continue making the house payments like I have been, our house will be paid off next year. I can take pride in my actions now. I even opened a checking account - again - with David’s permission, and have been totally responsible with it, never allowing it to be overdrawn. My account is accessible on line, and I have told David he has full access to it. I have nothing to hide. THAT is a good feeling.

Turning The Corner

I always have to sit back and take pride in my middle son, who has come such a long ways. When he was a teenager, he made life interesting, and I earn a fair amount of my gray hairs just from from him. As he became a young adult, he did ok, but still made his share of mistakes along the way. I worried about him when he would do, what we would consider, stupid things. But, we also knew it was just part of the learning process. He had a good job, and yet, he always seemed to have a cash advance loan hanging over him. He never seemed to get caught up.

And then. He turned the corner. He started putting money away. He stopped overspending, and budgeting his money. When he applied for a house loan, he was turned down, but it was very much a learning process for him, and made his realize just how foolish some of those things he did when he was younger really were. He took ownership of those very delinquent bills, and now it is his goal to get a decent credit rating, and sometime, down the line, be able to apply for a house loan again, and be approved.

Friday Fill-in

#58

1. I’m looking forward to scrapbooking with Ruth on March 8.
2. London is a place I always wanted to visit and haven’t made it there yet.
3. I’ve fallen in love with the new Shifter theme.
4. Six of one, half a dozen of another.
5. Addiction to blogging can be hazardous to your time restraints.
6. The things Malachi says crack me up!
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to watching Las Vegas with my hubby, tomorrow my plans include staying home and saving my money for my scrapbooking day with Ruth and Sunday, I want to do some cleaning and organizing!

A Mistake Made

I thought it was behind me. There was a time in my life when money and myself were not a good match. I did all kinds of things to mess up our finances. But, I am happy to say that we finally reached a middle ground that works for both of us, and more importantly, I can get through the day without fear of the phone ringing, or worrying about what might come in the mail, or what David might find. Its been a good couple of years, and it really isn’t a place I ever want to go back to. But old reactions die hard. David messed up last week. He didn’t get into town early enough Saturday to deposit his check. And then. He forgot. It was Tuesday evening when he realized he still hadn’t made a deposit, although he had been paying bills like he had. Needless to say, his
checking account took a hit. 2 overdrafts. The bank paid them, but it still didn’t make him a happy camper. Why did I say old reactions die hard? When I saw the overdrafts, my first reaction was pure panic. “OMG…how am I going to fix this?” was my thought. I was in pure panic mode.

And then. It hit me. This wasn’t me. I didn’t mess up. I wasn’t given his check to deposit, I haven’t written any checks on his account, have not even asked for a check to get groceries or anything else. I was not responsible in any way, shape, or form for what had just happened. But that didn’t stop me from being in tears. From having that knot in my stomach.

Here’s where things are different though (course, it helps when you aren’t at fault). I gave him the 2 slips from the bank. I didn’t hide them or try to make them go away. I knew he’d be mad. Even though I knew the anger wouldn’t — couldn’t — be directed at me, I knew he’d be mad. There was a day I would do anything - conceal anything — to keep him from getting mad. But. I gave him the evidence of his mistake, watched him get mad — at himself — and then I had a good cry, and was so happy to hear the words “this isn’t your fault. I’m the one who messed up”. We’ve come a long way. Both of us.

Signs of Responsibility

Something we were concerned about when Ethan started working was how he would manage his money. He was feeling all grown up and he has watched us through the years handling checking accounts and he thought this was what he needed to do. That really scared me, but we decided to give it a go. Except, we did make sure it was a 2-signature account. We told him we wouldn’t dictate what checks he could or couldn’t write. But, if we saw any signs of mishandling the account, then the account would closed, no questions asked. With our names on the account, we weren’t going to go down that path of bounced checks and having to fund him along the way.

He actually has done pretty well. He has paid off some major debts (consequences of action — car accidents). No overdrafts. And now the newness has worn off, and the last few months, he has just paid on his notes, and just carried cash the rest of the time. I know he needs to have “managing a checking account” experience before he gets out in the real world, and so far, he has shown up a good sense of responsibility.